7 Tips for Dating as a Minimalist
Dating in general can be hard. All the apps, the swiping, the ghosting, and many other things that frustrates this generation in particular.
Taking a minimalist approach might just be the way to make dating a whole lot simpler. Single people can be able to bring the fun back into going out with someone new.
Most people as they get closer to their 30’s and beyond want to stop fooling around. They’re done with the hook-ups and want more meaning in their next intimate relationship with someone.
Getting more personal fulfillment is exactly what minimalism is all about. Here are some tips you can follow to simplify your dating life.
1. Use only one app at a time
I can get why people feel the need to use multiple apps. The more places you’re out there, the more likely you can find someone or be found.
I tried that out back in my single days. But the thing I found was that it really wasn’t that effective. Usually I’d just end up having more success on one website than I would another.
It would simply just be a waste of time to go on the other ones. Once I realized that, I chose to put most of my focus on the platform I was having the most success with.
Whichever app or website you’re having more conversations on, stick with that one. If you feel it’s not working as well over time, then you can deactivate your profile and try a different one.
Help yourself feel less overwhelmed with the process by just focusing your energy in one place.
2. Filter your messages
Look around the site you’re using and see if there’s a way to filter your messages. One of the biggest complaints, particularly among females, is getting a lot of messages that are pointless.
Being notified of people who just say “hi” or only comment on their looks. You could see if there’s a way to keep certain messages with certain phrases or words out of your inbox.
At the time I last was on a relationship website, you could filter out any messages that were from locations not in your area.
See what tools the app you’re using offers to help cut down on the clutter you deal with in your inbox. That way, you can deal with less of the constant notifications on your phone.
In fact, you could just turn off notifications or only choose to access a particular platform on your PC
3. Highlight personality traits you admire
What personality traits do you really admire in people? Go into detail about that on your profile. Now that’s not to be confused with making a list of demands.
A profile where someone was just saying “Don’t message me if you’re this, that, or whatever,” comes off too negative. You don’t want to sound difficult.
Just simply state what you really admire and communicate how you reflect that yourself. The kind of person you would hope for will likely resonate with that and want to start a conversation.
A lot of people can tend to keep their profiles a little too casual. Saying things like “I’m just seeing what’s out there” or just writing a few casual details and saying “Message me if you’re interested.”
If you’re really serious about finding a meaningful relationship, go deep about what you like and what you hope for. Make clear what your values are.
4. Limit your conversations to three or less
I know it might seem too much to ask, but this is about simplifying everything. Center your focus around three promising individuals or less.
Don’t turn this into the Bachelor or Bachelorette. Limiting conversation to three or less will allow you to really analyze if you could potentially have a relationship with a specific person.
5. Go out and meet people
Just because it can be done on the internet, doesn’t mean that’s the best way to do things. It’s easier to get a sense of connection with someone if you actually talk to them in person.
There’s no guarantee the person you talk to online will be someone you eventually meet. At least when you’re out, there’s a chance.
Find a group that shares your interests or go to a place that you would hope someone you like would go to as well.
Maybe you’ll see someone that catches your eye and you can try to spark a conversation with them. I know that can be nerve-racking, but it’s only a moment in time.
If it doesn’t go the way you hope, it’ll fade away eventually, and you can try to talk to someone else.
6. Take care of yourself
People are more attracted to people who seem like they take care of themselves. That’s something that should already be high on your priority list even without a person in the picture.
Continually work on eating well and exercising. Make it a habit to groom yourself well and dress nicely. Give people positive reasons to notice you.
Looking good on the outside can also help you feel more confident on the inside. Confidence is also a very attractive trait to most people.
Be more able to own who you are as a person by taking care of yourself well.
7. Enjoy your time
The biggest mistake I think people make with dates is taking things too seriously. Yes, there needs to be some seriousness with knowing if you share values, but you need to have fun too.
Don’t go into your dates focused on being perfect and having the best time. Just focus on enjoying conversations with another person and making the most of the occasion regardless of what comes of it.
If you two decide to meet up again another time, great. If you two don’t or conversation stops being consistent, so be it.
No matter what happens, at least you’ll be able to say you enjoyed yourself. You should also have other things going on in your life you really enjoy to where a relationship not happening isn’t a big deal.
To be frank with you, relationships happening can be very rare at times. So many variables have to connect together, it can almost seem like a miracle when one actually happens.
Don’t fret if a situation doesn’t turn into one. Just know your time can eventually come and enjoy your life anyway.