Speak Up For Yourself – 5 Tips To Speak Up More
If you’re more on the introverted side like me, you’ve probably had to work on speaking up for yourself most of your life.
Maybe you’ve had to have people speak up for you on your behalf because you had no idea what to say in a specific moment.
It’s probably felt discouraging and frustrating for you to feel like you can’t say what you want to say when you need to.
Thankfully, you can learn to be more assertive in communicating what you think and feel through practice and encouraging yourself.
What does speaking up for yourself mean?
Speaking up for yourself means choosing to say what you feel or think when you feel it’s necessary.
In some cases, you may not feel like you have to speak your mind, but it shouldn’t be because you’re afraid of what people will think.
When should you be speaking up for yourself?
In my own life, I don’t always say everything on my mind because I feel like it’s better if I just move on and let something go.
But I’ve had to learn that you can’t always let things go and just move on, and that you shouldn’t tolerate blatant disrespect.
Here are a few tips that can help you speak up more in life.
How do you start speaking up for yourself?
1. Accept you’ll be judged or rejected
No matter how you say something or do something, at least one person every now and then will judge you and/or reject you.
That’s just life. Not everybody is going to like you or be happy with you. There’s nothing wrong with trying to be respectful and kind.
The problem is being so respectful and kind you allow yourself to be disrespected and treated unkindly.
As long as you know you genuinely intend no harm in what you’re saying, you can be okay with yourself.
The ones who really respect and love you will hear you out and try to be understanding of your perspective.
2. Speak loud and clear
I’m a pretty soft-spoken person by nature, but there are moments where I have to remind myself to speak louder and clearer.
In any interaction you have with people, make it a habit to speak loud enough to ensure the other person hears what you’re saying.
It’s important to be comfortable with loud and clear communication, because that’s what you’ll have to do in the moments you’re speaking up for yourself.
3. Be less hesitant
A part of speaking up for yourself is giving a firm and confident answer. A firm and confident answer means not hesitating in what you say.
You may not know exactly what to say in the moment, but you can communicate that as you’re trying to share your perspective.
Be confident and firm in your answers shows people that you’re serious in what you’re saying and you expect to be taken seriously.
It’s understandable you want to avoid conflict sometimes. But part of the reason you may struggle with speaking up for yourself is you don’t recognize when you do need to be direct regardless of the potential conflict.
If something’s really bothering you in an interaction, you’re having with someone, don’t be afraid to say something.
As implied earlier, conflict will inevitably happen at times when dealing with people because we’re all emotional creatures.
We all have to pick and choose our battles, but don’t always choose not to battle for sake of avoiding conflict.
You’ll only build up frustration and resentment within yourself because you allow yourself to deal with things you know you shouldn’t have to.
5. Build your confidence
The main reason some of us don’t speak up for ourselves is because we lack confidence in ourselves.
It’s important to take steps that can help you feel more confident in yourself and feel good enough to speak up.
There are a variety of things that can build your confidence. You can exercise more to make yourself feel better about how you look.
You could take a public speaking class that makes you more comfortable with communicating to people.
Try learning new things and skills that challenge you and make you feel more confident in your abilities to live your life.
The more confidence you feel in yourself, the more you’ll be able to say what’s on your mind and in your heart when you need to.
Final thoughts on speaking up
Just as many people around you are readily able to speak up when they want, why can’t you? You deserve to let your feelings be known when something bothers you.
You don’t have to feel like you can’t stand up for what you think or believe. As you do what you can to grow as a person, you’ll get better and better at speaking your mind.
Keep these tips as mind as you work to become the person that speaks up for themselves when necessary.